i hate you because…

  1. Current Crush, I hate you because you love her and now I listen to Jonas brothers breakup songs from a billion years ago and eat cheese.

  2. Boyfriend, I hate you because you suck. Sometimes I wish you loved me at least half as much as you loved your laptop.

  3. Current Crush, I hate you because I always get lost in your green eyes and I just bought a new fucking GPS.

  4. Friend, I hate you because i'm ALWAYS the one texting you first.

  5. Girlfriend, I hate you because I love the dog more than you and you won't let me keep her. She is the bitch i love not you!!!

  6. Wife, I hate you because you gained so much weight. I don't really hate you... i love you... but i'm not attracted to you anymore. I hate myself!

  7. Boyfriend, I hate you because you are great in bed, but you suck at everything else

  8. Ex-Boyfriend, I hate you because you refused to interact with me on social media and now you won't stop twetting about your "beautiful" new girlfriend. "#LuckyMe" #GagMe

  9. Friend, I hate you because you manipulated my emotions just when I was at my most vulnerable.

  10. Ex-Boyfriend, I hate you because you became "out of my league" since we dated and now I have to listen to literally every girl squeal about how "hot" you are.

  11. Current Crush, I hate you because day after day, text after text, it all meant nothing. When you finally do get into town you're MIA.

  12. Current Crush, I hate you because you live with a man who loves you, who you don't love back. Don't you know that I love you?

  13. Ex-Boyfriend, I hate you because after 18 years you tell me you never were my friend, but you met someone else and now we can be.

  14. Boyfriend, I hate you because you act like a little princess. you moan and moan till the jewels of your crown fall off. you're a prick of a princess.

  15. Current Crush, I hate you because i always try not be in love with you but i just fall in love with you all over again.

  16. More posts